Body Image

“I don’t know what you see in me.” — I’ve said this to Alpha many times —

Like most women, I struggle with body image issues. We all compare ourselves to the women we see in magazines (well-knowing they have been photoshopped and airbrushed), on television, in movies, and yes, even porn, and feel that we’re not good enough–breasts too small, butt not perky, tummy too round, icky love handles, and now, no six-pack abs. We know it’s unrealistic to think we can look like those women whose lives revolve around dieting, exercise, trainers, and plastic surgery (because their livelihood is tied to their bodies), and not around family, work, and limited finances. And if you’re a woman of “a certain age”, as I am, on top of everything else, you’re contending with gray hairs, wrinkles, and a traitorous body that is slowly creeping south.

Alpha tells me I’m beautiful in his eyes, that He could never see me as anything but beautiful, and that I’m perfectly imperfect for Him. He constantly reassures me of His love for me, and His desire for me. And I hear the sincerity in His voice, see it in His eyes. Still, I struggle.

Logically, I know what He means because I love Him, and in doing so, love His body. He has many scars from repeated surgeries that attempted, with limited results, to fix an injury He suffered in the military. And like me, He’s no longer a spring chicken…er…rooster. But I love every imperfection, every scar, every extra pound. I crave His body, love worshiping every inch of it with my fingers, lips, and tongue. I want that beautiful body sleeping beside me for the rest of my life.

He is my perfect sexy Alpha. Why is it so hard to see myself as His perfect sexy kat?

submissive Perspective

Submission is not something I granted on a whim, but with the understanding that You would love and cherish me in exchange for what I have freely given. I do not kneel to You out of fear; I kneel out of respect and the need to please You.

Understand that though I am an individual with my own wants and needs, and the desire to see them fulfilled, I want to fulfill Your wants and needs as well. My commitment to Your wellbeing in all areas of our relationship is just as strong as Yours is to me.

Believe that I will do my best to make Your life happy, that I will never intentionally disrespect You or go against Your will. I want to always be Your “good girl”, but if I fail, I will take the punishment that we agreed upon without complaint.

Mistakes will happen on both our parts, but I vow that I will not dwell on Yours, nor will I hold them against You (we are fallible beings, after all). I will never bring them up again in conversation, for as we agreed, they have been addressed and are now in the past.

Including you in every aspect of my life is my desire and my duty. I will not seek out others to take on the role of best friend or confidant or playmate, but will always count on You to fulfill those needs. And I will avail myself to You in any way You see fit, both physically and emotionally.

Showing my submission to You is something I will do every day, both in and out of the bedroom. I know that doing so brings out Your natural dominant personality, thus strengthening our D/s dynamic, allowing both of us to thrive within the relationship.

Sharing my inner self with You is my duty as Your submissive. I cannot expect you to keep me protected and safe if you don’t know my demons.

Intimacy will remain between us. I will not share my worries or concerns–especially regarding our relationship–with anyone but You. I will not allow another person, nether emotionally or physically, entrance within our sacred circle of love, trust, and respect.

Value beyond measure will always be placed on our relationship. I will never intentionally tarnish it by word or deed. I will do everything in my power to keep it strong, to make it a safe harbor for both of us, a place where there is no You or me–only us.

Envelop me in Your love, surround me with high walls only You know how to breach. I need the sanctuary of Your unconditional love to feel truly safe, to be free to be just…me.

Alpha’s Dominant Perspective here

He Is

He is the smile in my days
the sigh in my nights
the howl in the darkness
the laugh in the light.

He is the beating of my heart
the pounding in my veins
the breath in my lungs
the dopamine in my brain

He is the fever in my loins
the calmness in my soul
the joy in my heart
the fruition of life’s goal

He is the hope that lifts me
the trust that keeps me safe
the faith that moves me
the dream of a better place

He is the roads I walk
the places I’ve never been
He is my salvation…
….and my greatest sin

 

Kinky Nursery Rhyme

One, two,
No clothes, no shoes;
Three, four,
Kneel at door;
Five, six,
Bag of tricks;
Seven, eight,
Laid out straight;
Nine, ten,
What and when;
Eleven, twelve,
He dips and delves;
Thirteen, fourteen,
Spanks His queen;
Fifteen, sixteen,
Until blush is seen;
Seventeen, eighteen,
Unzips His jeans;
Nineteen, twenty,
Kinky fun a’plenty.

I’ll Keep You Safe

He grabbed her long ponytail, gave it a yank
Get your butt back on the bike, he said
I’ll keep you steady, doofus, I’ll keep you safe

He tucked a squiggly curl back into place
Dance with me, you’ll do okay, he said
I’ll hold you tight, babe, I’ll keep you safe

He lifted the veil from her beaming face
I promise to love you forever, he said,
I’ll walk by your side, wife, I’ll keep you safe

He smoothed sweat-soaked hair from her flushed face,
Almost there, bear down and push, he said,
I’m right here, my queen, I’ll keep you safe

He grasped her hair in a fisted embrace
I’m going to blindfold and tie you, he said
Use and abuse you, sweet sub, but I’ll keep you safe

He brushed white hair from her tired, wrinkled face
I’ve got your hand, I won’t let go, he said
I’ll see you to the other side, my love, I’ll keep you safe

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Photos via Pixabay