Down and Dirty

OMG! I’m still smiling from my recent fuck session with kat. Yes, I mean “fuck session” not love session. There is always love as the foundation between us, but sometimes we’re both craving a no-holds-barred nasty as we can be fuck fest.

Sex sessions come in a wide variety, and as a playful and exploratory kind of guy I’ve definitely done my share to diversify my experiences. So I say, thank God, the sexual revolution, and finding the perfect mate.

Some days you just got to get down and dirty. Sure, kat and I enjoy caressing, cuddling, massaging, and other applications of loving touch. In fact, she learned early in our relationship that I’m a very affectionate guy (since I grew up in a non-affectionate family and swore I’d never be like that as an adult). Ahh… but I digress.

The simple fact is we are human. We are prone to a variety of moods, and the stress and cares of daily life and relationships can alter those moods. And over-and-above our basic mood swings we also have sexual needs and desires that can easily run the gamut from Vanilla to German Chocolate to Ebony Black Forest Fudge (getting hungry yet?).

Simply put, some days a traditional roll-in-the-hay just isn’t good enough. Perhaps you had a stressful day at work, or the kids broke their all-time record for getting on your nerves, or your Monster-in-law lived up to her title with a two-hour bitch session. Or maybe you just woke up horny as hell, got hornier throughout the day, and by the time you get some alone time with your mate you feel like a sex-addict who just found out your mate is a nymphomaniac that develops amnesia after every orgasm…and refuses to quit until she’s satisfied.

Or maybe, if you’re like me, you’re so fucking in love, like, and lust with your mate you don’t really need a reason to want to ravish them. Or you find that any reason is as good as another. For instance, kat’s normal attire is a t-shirt and panties, cuz’ I’m not big on fancy lingerie; I like the wholesome girl-next-door-look (with one exception, of course, my girl wears a collar). And after hours of seeing her with just enough covered to keep sparking the imagination and teasing my desires, I begin to wonder if the zipper on my Wrangler jeans can withstand the growing pressure. In other words, it’s time for this Alpha to pounce.

What’s that? Did I hear someone in the peanut gallery ask, “What about foreplay?”

Unlike many couples, kat and I believe foreplay is every waking second of every day. We don’t believe in relationships that are 50/50; we believe that both mates need to give 100% at all times, and that includes our view of foreplay. To us, foreplay is showing we love, cherish, adore, and respect each other every waking second. And when we constantly treat each other with love and affection we stay in a condition of readiness for whenever the opportunities present themselves. And kat loves it this way because—unlike her prior relationships—I show her constant love and affection throughout every day, instead of only paying her compliments or playing grab ass five seconds before I want to fuck her, and calling that foreplay like so many guys that don’t know how to touch a woman’s emotions.

A guy I’ve known for years constantly complains about his wife not being very spontaneous, but when I ask him what he does to help get her in the mood, he says if he had to do something to get her in the mood it destroys the whole purpose of being spontaneous. And he wonders why she spurns his advances most the time, and just lays there like an inanimate object on the rare occasion she sheds her panties.

Kat, on the other hand, is in a constant state of readiness because of my consistently showing love and affection—which includes sharing duties so we can get them over and done with quicker, in order to have more time for ourselves—so when I decide I want to surprise her, push her against a wall, fondle her, rip her clothes off, sweep her up into my arms, carry her to the closest piece of furniture I can bend her over, and lick, suck, and fuck her brains out, not once has she ever complained. In fact, her actions, physical response, and words tell me she only wants more.

So when I told kat that we were going to get fucking nasty this time, all she did was say, “Yes, Daddy, I’ll be a very nasty girl for you.” And she was. And when our sexual urges were sated we talked and laughed for hours afterward.

Yep, some days you just got to get down and dirty. But in order for those days to work you’ve got to show each other love, affection, and respect every day, without fail, so the passion is always smoldering within you both and ready to be ignited when the opportunities arise.

Body Image

“I don’t know what you see in me.” — I’ve said this to Alpha many times —

Like most women, I struggle with body image issues. We all compare ourselves to the women we see in magazines (well-knowing they have been photoshopped and airbrushed), on television, in movies, and yes, even porn, and feel that we’re not good enough–breasts too small, butt not perky, tummy too round, icky love handles, and now, no six-pack abs. We know it’s unrealistic to think we can look like those women whose lives revolve around dieting, exercise, trainers, and plastic surgery (because their livelihood is tied to their bodies), and not around family, work, and limited finances. And if you’re a woman of “a certain age”, as I am, on top of everything else, you’re contending with gray hairs, wrinkles, and a traitorous body that is slowly creeping south.

Alpha tells me I’m beautiful in his eyes, that He could never see me as anything but beautiful, and that I’m perfectly imperfect for Him. He constantly reassures me of His love for me, and His desire for me. And I hear the sincerity in His voice, see it in His eyes. Still, I struggle.

Logically, I know what He means because I love Him, and in doing so, love His body. He has many scars from repeated surgeries that attempted, with limited results, to fix an injury He suffered in the military. And like me, He’s no longer a spring chicken…er…rooster. But I love every imperfection, every scar, every extra pound. I crave His body, love worshiping every inch of it with my fingers, lips, and tongue. I want that beautiful body sleeping beside me for the rest of my life.

He is my perfect sexy Alpha. Why is it so hard to see myself as His perfect sexy kat?

More than just a word

Birthday 3



Someone said your name today

Then went about their business

I thought… how foolish

How inadequate

Do they not see the error of their way?

Acting as if it is a mere word

But it is a magical word

A word that holds an ocean

Our ocean of love

An ocean where you and I sail upon waves of wishes

Where we drown in our passions

And are reborn in pure pleasure

Cast forth…orgasmically…through water spouts

It is a word that travels

To the moon and back

From star to star

Throughout the universe and beyond

To the depths of my soul

To the end of my days

And it is a word that conquers time

The beginning of my life

The whole of my past

The all of my present

The forever of my future

My life after death

And it is the epitome of love

The fulfillment of my needs and desires

The bearer of my heart

Cherished and adored

Loved, liked, lusted

My all

My everything


And always

Kat… it is more than just a word





Birthday 5

submissive Perspective

Submission is not something I granted on a whim, but with the understanding that You would love and cherish me in exchange for what I have freely given. I do not kneel to You out of fear; I kneel out of respect and the need to please You.

Understand that though I am an individual with my own wants and needs, and the desire to see them fulfilled, I want to fulfill Your wants and needs as well. My commitment to Your wellbeing in all areas of our relationship is just as strong as Yours is to me.

Believe that I will do my best to make Your life happy, that I will never intentionally disrespect You or go against Your will. I want to always be Your “good girl”, but if I fail, I will take the punishment that we agreed upon without complaint.

Mistakes will happen on both our parts, but I vow that I will not dwell on Yours, nor will I hold them against You (we are fallible beings, after all). I will never bring them up again in conversation, for as we agreed, they have been addressed and are now in the past.

Including you in every aspect of my life is my desire and my duty. I will not seek out others to take on the role of best friend or confidant or playmate, but will always count on You to fulfill those needs. And I will avail myself to You in any way You see fit, both physically and emotionally.

Showing my submission to You is something I will do every day, both in and out of the bedroom. I know that doing so brings out Your natural dominant personality, thus strengthening our D/s dynamic, allowing both of us to thrive within the relationship.

Sharing my inner self with You is my duty as Your submissive. I cannot expect you to keep me protected and safe if you don’t know my demons.

Intimacy will remain between us. I will not share my worries or concerns–especially regarding our relationship–with anyone but You. I will not allow another person, nether emotionally or physically, entrance within our sacred circle of love, trust, and respect.

Value beyond measure will always be placed on our relationship. I will never intentionally tarnish it by word or deed. I will do everything in my power to keep it strong, to make it a safe harbor for both of us, a place where there is no You or me–only us.

Envelop me in Your love, surround me with high walls only You know how to breach. I need the sanctuary of Your unconditional love to feel truly safe, to be free to be just…me.

Alpha’s Dominant Perspective here

Emotional Reassurance: a Dom’s responsibility

Fulfilling our sub’s wants and needs, especially sexually, is an honor and a privilege for us Doms: not to mention a stroke to our ego and a hell of a fucking turn-on. But it’s also our responsibility to keep our sub protected and safe, and that doesn’t just mean physically. We need to remember their psychological and emotional stability as well. And I caution you to never overlook those areas, or get into the habit of taking them lightly—especially when you consider the fact that women, for the most part, are far more emotional than men. Continue reading “Emotional Reassurance: a Dom’s responsibility”