Total Eclipse vs Solar Fuck Fest

“Come one, come all,” I’ve heard all year

See the total eclipse of the sun

And you live in a place to see it well

You’ll have oodles and boodles of fun

 

You’ll have people come to town

That have never been here before

Perhaps a quarter-of-a-million folks

And some say maybe more

 

NASA has already sent a team

Months ahead for preparation

To tell of the Solar Fest

It’s more fun than masturbation

 

And have you heard how properties

Up for sale in these three counties

Have been bought by greedy bastards

In order to charge exorbitant bounties

 

And all the local establishments

Are hawking Solar Fest fare

Like cheap ass glasses to scorch your eyes

You forgot “buyer beware”

 

And because of the looky loos a comin’

The rainbow crowd has come to roost

Not to brighten the festivities

But they sure give our crime stats a boost

 

I know exactly where I’ll be

During the total solar eclipse

Watching kat’s sexy ass moon the sun

Shading me as I lick her pussy lips

 

And while all the millions stare at the sun

Some that will even risk going blind

I’ll gladly send kat to sub-space

While butt-fucking her from behind

 

So go on and enjoy your total eclipse

If that’s really the best you can do

I’ll spend it with kat who’s eclipsed my heart with hers

Cuz’ my folks didn’t raise no fool

 

And when you go to tell your tale

About how you enjoyed Solar Fest

Standing like an idiot staring at the sun

I’ll speak of a tale concerning kat’s tail

And know that it’s I who was truly blest

And wisely enjoyed the greater fun

 

eclipse 13

A Bloody Lesson

[This is not our usual type of post, and if talking about blood gets you queasy, please skip this post.]

I’m going to talk about something from the male perspective, but I found out that something similar can occur to females as well.

I went through something recently that, although I’m middle-aged, I had never heard or read about, and it was rather a rude awakening. And it is for that reason I’m telling the embarrassing tale. I truly hope it doesn’t happen to any of you, but just in case it does maybe by hearing about it before it does from someone who has gone through it might ease your mind. Just remember the key words: don’t panic.

While showering I noticed a simple spot just off-center on the head of my penis. It was very small, and looked like either a mole or the beginning of a pimple (which I thought was really weird, since I’d never even developed pimples during adolescence). And upon further investigation there were no other visible symptoms.

Having never encountered this before, and not wanting oddities popping up where I didn’t want them, I decided to rub it clean or pick it off.

Big mistake!

As soon as the tiny spot popped off blood began to pour out…and I do mean pour! In just seconds blood was pooling in the tub and both my hands were a bloody mess—which made it a bit difficult to grip things that needed to be gripped and grab things that needed to be grabbed in an effort to stop the flow.

I will spare you all the bloody details of my various attempts to squelch the flow, except to tell you that I finally accomplished the task with the medical equivalent of choking the chicken. But by the time I stopped the bleeding the place looked like a slaughter house. After all, that part of the anatomy ebbs and flows (is soft or hard) based on blood circulation. And along with the bathtub, the floor, toilet, wastebasket, and a couple towels were soaked or splattered with blood. And, of course, along with my hands I was splattered from the waist down and needed another shower.

Now you have to understand that I’ve seen a lot of violence and bloodshed in my life, so I don’t get flustered easily. I didn’t yell out or try to call anyone: no, not even kat. I simply focused my energy on stopping the blood. However, as soon as it was stopped I recall thinking the following:

“I’ve survived the barrio, military wounds, years of investigations and being shot at, along with a lifetime of seeking adrenaline rushes in activities like skydiving, scuba diving, mountain climbing, etc, and here I almost died from a pimple on my pecker.”

Well, as it turned out it wasn’t a pimple, it was similar to a blood blister, and the blood filled up inside instead of near the surface. That’s why I couldn’t see it.

I found out that males and females can develop these around their genitalia, and they can look like pimples, moles, blackheads, and even age spots. But, heaven forbid, if you ever get one please learn from my embarrassing mistake… don’t rub, scratch, or pick it.

[Please see MisterMan’s comment below for another possible explanation.]

Guilty of Lust in the 1st Degree

We have sessions quite traditional and ordinary

Using hugs and kisses, caresses, and missionary

But truth be told

It truly gets old

So with sex we change it, rearrange it, and often vary

 

If your sex life is in danger of being too nice

Just change the recipe and add some spice

Get out of the rut

Fuck her hard like a slut

And tell her she’s worth twice the price

 

Have date nights where you charm her to score

Then unshackle your passion and let it soar

You’ve built the trust

Now set free the lust

Love her like a wife, but fuck her like a whore

 

As a Dom you should love, like, and lust her

And always earn the right to be called “Sir”

Want to hear her scream?

Spread her cheeks and ream

Then fuck her ass hard like a real Master

 

I’ve allowed my sub to start when acting coy

She often kneels and offers a belt as her ploy

I politely do “Thank”

Then give her a good spank

Knowing she wants to be used like a fuck toy

 

There are times when you let her simply suck you

You can change it up by face fucking her too

Then cum on her face

For a change of pace

But without the cock whipping—don’t be cruel

 

If you want your sub submitting willingly

Fulfill her darkest desires orgasmically

Do what it takes

So she quivers and quakes

Stay guilty of lust in the 1st degree

Wet Dream

Tonight in a dream a fantasy I saw

Our passions erupted: pure, primal, and raw

You tried to seduce, you flirted and teased

But I am the Alpha; I did as I pleased

 

You acted coy, and played hard to get

But I smelled your arousal, you were sopping wet

You knew I was hard, and wanted you now

But you playfully fled, tried to escape me somehow

 

There’ll be no escape, upon you I pounce

And I take all your lovin’, every last ounce

I spank and I nibble, I finger and fuck

And on nipples and clit I lick and I suck

 

My shaft is extended, hard like an oak

My intentions are clear, a marathon poke

I’ve already made your sweet pussy purr

It’s time to turn over and give me the cure

 

The cure to life’s boredom are in moments like this

Fucking your tight ass gives me moments of bliss

So I touch my cock head to your tight little hole

As the alarm clock awakens me—Oh, HELL NO!!!

From Pud to Stud

They say, “Youth is wasted on the young”

Sad, but true, especially when it comes to love—and sex

Mostly sex

I can easily recall the days of rock hard abs

Wet dreams every night

Woodies every morning

Pre-teens and teens claiming to be studs

For getting to first base

Maybe second

And heckling your buddies

For beating their puds

While lying

And denying

Pubescent pecker parties of one

Nightly

Perhaps twice

Even thrice

Daily

 

Each year older and a little bolder

The lies grow exponentially

Beyond the fractions of your actions

Your best bud beats you

He’s the first to go all the way

“For real,” he says

Till you find out

From a friend of a friend

He shot his wad on her panties

Before his dick ever touched her quim

Then fate chooses to be kind

With your first time all the way

You earn the right of a shit eating grin

You play with her pussy

Then stick it right in

Before your five second fiasco

But what a glorious five seconds

Till she complains about your lack of stamina

And you try to compare it to rodeo stars

Where eight seconds is all that’s required

But your sales pitch fails

And the jail bait bails

Though you call after her

Claiming we can try again

And she drops you even lower

“Come back when you become a man”

 

If you survive the embarrassment of youth

The day does arrive when you become a man

Perhaps even a stud

But only if you’ve learned the art of the mind-fuck

You’ve got to capture a woman’s emotions

Long before the oral

The vaginal

The anal

And all other pleasures you take in hand